Thoughts 15

This Silent Sillies Thoughts is a very special one for me. (my comments are pretty long today. Sorry in advance, and thanks if you read them all the way through.) I added a scripture verse to the image this time because I had been feeling very depressed for several month/years maybe? I could feel the anxiety in me swelling lately though. I felt lost in a room full of friends, and fear felt overwhelming when the idea a new social interaction with someone became available. Also this past election in the United States seemed to be fueled on hatred, hatred from both sides and I did not want to choose a side of hatred, I want to refuse to hate.

For me pain and sorrow started to be a daily feeling and I'm not sure why. I think mostly I felt insecure about everything in my life. Then a few weeks ago I realized over the years I had lost focus on what really matters to me... Jesus. I didn't grow up going to church, in fact I wanted nothing to do with it, but I came to really know and study Jesus Christ in college at a Lutheran student ministry in Tempe Arizona. I hear stories of most kids loosing their faith in college, but mine really grew during my college years.  I meet some amazing people in college that really taught me what God's love is all about.

Anyway I moved away from Arizona and started a family in Branson Mo. Yet never found a church family here and on Saturday March 18 I found I really lost my focus, and I was really feeling the anxiety growing inside of me so I prayed for His guidance to help me focus on Him again and remove these angry, depressed feelings. The next morning I searched online for local churches, and found a lot of choices in the area, but I found one that was not in a fancy church building, it is inside a winery (0_o) and I felt moved to go there. The sermon was about the lost son returning to his Father, which is an allegory for God's love for us no matter what. Long story short, I gave up my anxiety to God and I feel at peace now. I felt I should share my story, and explain the reason for the scripture at the bottom.

If you stayed with me this long, congrats! I also want to share some other good news I found yesterday! Some traffic to the site started coming from this past week and I found a page was created for Silent Sillies on May 4th! Check out the site, and the page that gives examples of some of the silly tropes we have used in the past!

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